It's news to us
COMIC Relief will soon have the ability to launch strategic comedians.
12/10/2013 6:05:50 AM
THE destruction of a Lenin statue in the Ukraine has been condemned by hipsters who wanted it for their roof garden.
12/10/2013 5:48:38 AM
WORLD of Warcraft was monitored by NSA agents to assess the risk of orcs invading mainland America, it has been confirmed.
12/10/2013 5:12:29 AM
THE Guardian newspaper has launched its annual appeal to make you feel dreadful about Christmas.
12/10/2013 4:51:06 AM
FACEBOOK has launched a feature allowing users to express pleasure when friends post bad news.
12/10/2013 4:14:38 AM
SHERLOCK Holmes can return from the dead because he is magic, Sherlock creator Steven Moffat has revealed.
12/10/2013 4:01:01 AM
MANCHESTER United manager David Moyes said the team’s dismal form is the sort of thing that happens to him all the time.
12/10/2013 3:47:20 AM
TORONTO mayor Rob Ford has confirmed his new role delivering gifts in a magical sleigh.
12/9/2013 6:26:59 AM
IF the NSA keeps spying on the internet consumers will return to vinyl records and films on tape, massive companies have warned.
12/9/2013 5:18:58 AM
ALL-CONQUERING glamour club Stoke City are now a mathematical certainty to win the Premier League.
12/9/2013 5:07:32 AM
JERRY Dammers of The Special AKA is furious that nobody ever told him Nelson Mandela was also known as Madiba.
12/9/2013 4:24:20 AM
BRITAIN'S bosses have confirmed plans to let their hands 'accidentally' fall onto buttocks at the office Christmas party.
12/9/2013 3:57:57 AM
MEMBERS of Parliament are sure their 11 percent pay rise will eventually be seen as a political masterstroke.
12/9/2013 3:09:10 AM
ONE youth’s account of the novelty explosives trade that is ruining football.
12/6/2013 6:20:41 AM
NELSON Mandela has passed away after wearing himself out by changing the world.
12/6/2013 4:48:40 AM
YOUNG people have announced plans to lower the pension age by several decades once they’re in charge.
12/6/2013 4:40:20 AM
THE abolition of tax discs has left drivers without physical evidence of paying something that cyclists don't.
12/6/2013 3:52:25 AM
THE death of Nelson Mandela has left humanity without a single individual that you would genuinely not want to disappoint.
12/6/2013 3:31:49 AM
MILLIONS of consumers are regretting their actions on the brokest day of the year.
12/5/2013 5:48:41 AM
PEOPLE are today trying to comprehend the ‘reversible’ version of an object known to most as ‘thing’.
12/5/2013 5:25:42 AM